Everybody, men and women alike even children have their own comfort zones – be it at work, play and even in relationships. Comfort zones vary from person to person; generally, it is simply the best possible performance zone of an individual however when it comes to man and woman relationships the meaning takes on a different variation; a relationship’s comfort zone is more correctly interpreted as the idealization of what is perceived instead of the realization and acceptance of what is.
Although some people may disagree, this holds very true in a relationship – especially during the early stages. At the early stage of a relationship, everything between two people seems fresh, novel, exciting – there is nothing else that matters until reality sets in that the girl of your dreams has shortcomings and that you as the man of her dreams is not the knight in shining armor she thought you were! It is at this stage that both parties in the relationship begin to hopelessly cling to ideals rather than strengthen their weaknesses and accept their frailties as being human.
It is at this stage that closing your eyes to reality, clinging on to a dream, and denying your error in judgment begins to set in because of the effort both of you have gone through in finding each other and the fear of admission of defeat by ending the relationship. More often than not, instead of facing the problem and resolving the issue and ending the relationship, people continue on and further aggravate the situation while at the same time making one another’s life miserable.
False hopes coupled with unfounded illusions of change in your partner according to what you want your partner to be, slowly corrupts, poisons and destroys whatever friendship may have existed or could have flourished had simple acceptance of reality and one another’s weaknesses and shortcomings been dealt with responsibly as mature adults instead of simply being ignored as immature people are wont to do.
All things in life come to a pass. The novelty, the avant-garde, sooner or later will become history and if you are unaware of this in your relationship, then your relationship is doomed to fail even before you had begun. A relationship is always a two-way-street and a give-and-take proposition, never one-way and certainly not just giving or taking; it always takes two people to tango!
For a relationship to succeed, realization of one another’s weaknesses, shortcomings, failures, and yes, laziness, inherent in one another should be accepted. Otherwise, it will become a mountain of disagreement and source of discontent instead of just minor inconveniences that you can put up with because overall, you really do love the other person and would like to spend the rest of your life with him (or her) even he (or she) snores louder than you!
Instead of pretending, ignoring and closing your eyes, it is better to accept and work out differences, strengthen each other’s weaknesses and reinforce your strengths.